Tag Archives: Relationships

Start Over

Good morning Friends!

Today I wanted to pass along something that has been helpful to our family. The other morning I was fixing Leanne’s hair.  She didn’t like it and combed the braid out.  It upset me because I had worked hard on it and we were running out of time before the bus came.  I told her she would have to figure out how to fix her hair on her own and walked into the other room, upset (probably not the best of parenting!).  To my surprise she walked after me and asked,

“Mom, can we start over?”

I replied, “Sure!”  She stuck out her hand and we shook on it.

She smiled.

In a cheery voice I asked her how I could help her get ready for school, and off we went.  It was as if the short moment of frustration never happened.

KONICA MINOLTA DIGITAL CAMERADon’t get me wrong, when my kids or husband ask me to “start over” it takes a big swallow of pride to put my anger aside and agree to start fresh.  The human side of us just wants to stew over the problem, which only makes things worse and wastes a lot of time.

But just like ripping it like a band-aid, it only stings for a second!  Do yourself (and your loved ones) a favor by asking if you can START OVER the next time things head in the wrong direction.

Lara

Now that nicer weather is around the corner, do you need help getting motivated to do some spring cleaning? If so, read my “Rip It Like A Band-Aid” post!

 

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Filed under Family, Friends, Marriage, Parenthood, People, Relationships

Why Diets Don’t Work: Reason #7 and #8

Reason #7:  Diets Are Not Transferable to the Rest of Your Life

Reason #8:  Diets Focus on the Distant Future

**Stay with us…Sunday is our last day of discussing “Why Diets Don’t Work”! We’ll be diving in to Peace with Food (PWF) on Monday!**

Guess what? When we started having peace with food we quickly realized something: Other areas of our life were improving as well! It was crazy—not only were we experiencing peace with food but, without realizing it, we began applying the same principles to other areas of our life. Before we knew it, we could see the quality of our relationships and experiences increasing. Life, overall, just kept getting better and better!

We have to admit, realizing that our Peace with Food concept was spilling over into other areas of our life took us by complete surprise. When we decided to kick diets to the curb a few years ago, we really had no idea what direction we were headed. We just knew the outcome we wanted: to be able to live in peace and no longer let someone (or something) take control of our lives.

So how did we get there? We experimented. With every day, we tried, and tweaked, and tried again—committed to find a way to break free of the leash that had us by the ankles for years. Every time we felt restricted or uneasy, we dissected the situation to see how we could make changes to have more peace. This process became so normal that we naturally did it in all areas of our life. Day by day we continued to adjust and make changes, and with every step we began to feel more liberated.hawaii-3

This brings us to another cool thing about Peace with Food. From the moment you decide to embrace its lifestyle, you instantly feel your internal peace-gauge go up simply by saying good-bye to that old restricted way of life. Diets, on the other hand, instantly force you to give up savored aspects of life because their rules don’t accommodate them. They focus on giving you happiness in the distant future—whenever it is that you actually reach your goal weight. Sadly, most of us never even get there, so we never get to relish in that state of happiness.

Gladly, you don’t have to worry about that any more. Peace with Food can set you free the second you decide to allow it. Better yet, your entire life will improve because of it. All you have to do is take the first step and we’ll help guide you the rest of the way. More to come…

Lara & Robynn

 

Take-Home Message:

Peace with Food not only improves your relationship with food, but all other areas of your life. It also allows you to enjoy life right away.

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Why Diets Don’t Work: Reason #1

Sugar Cookies

Reason #1:  Diets use a cookie-cutter approach.

At Christmas season one of our favorite activities is making sugar cookies with our kids – the kind you make with cookie cutters.  We just love it!

And although this approach works wonderfully when you’re whipping out dozens of cookies, when talking about a diet, the cookie-cutter approach only proves to be a flop.

That is one thing we absolutely love about Peace with Food. It discards this cookie-cutter formula and instead encourages a custom-fit plan for each individual. Imagine that, a tailored plan, customized specifically for you! (Which, by the way, takes into account your preferences and helps you work with them leaving you feeling satisfied and at peace rather than deprive you of them.)

It is really similar to everything else in life.  Think about it.  How do you raise your kids?  How do you spend your money?  How do you handle your relationships?  Is there any aspect of your life in which you do every thing exactly like anyone else, even your closest friends and confidants?

Similar?  Maybe.  Exactly alike?  Impossible.  That’s because you are the only one living with your life, circumstances, preferences, and propensities.  You are unique.  Embrace it!!

What might work marvelously for one may be a totally dud for another. That’s okay. That just gives us the freedom to be our selves.

So, if you are tired of trying to fit into someone else’s mold, let it go.  Find what works for you and then go with it.  Life is too short to live by someone else’s formula.

lara-robynn1 (1)

 

 

Take-Home Message:

You are a one-of-a-kind masterpiece!  Living at Peace with Food will help you find your custom-fit plan, tailored specifically for you!

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Wait It Out

I don’t know about you, but when I get upset I want to get it off my chest as soon as I can.  Let me tell ya, there are diSadvAntaGes to that.  I have found that if I speak my mind as the disagreement arises, I usually regret what was said.

The other day I was aggravated.  A first, I let my mind spiral out of control on all the things that bothered me about the situation.  Instead of verbalizing them as they came to mind, like I normally do, I took time to think long and hard about what I was going to say before pleading my case.  By thinking things through I was able to sift out unnecessary comments that would have been said only due to anger.  This was HuGe because back in the day it would have caused our arguments to fester twice as long!  By taking the time to fully evaluate the real reason I was upset, I had already calmed down which naturally heLpeD me discuss the situation in a more reasonable manner.

It is easy to want quick results and responses in all that we do.  The longer I live, the more I see the benefits in not getting in a HURRY.  As painful as it was to keep my mouth shut until I calmed down to carefully choose my words, it allowed me to resolve a problem with a person that wasn’t hurtful to them and regretful to me.

Taking the time to be more selective in what comes out of your mouth.  If your thoughts are going a hundred miles an hour, that is not the time to be verbalizing them.  Believe me; I know it is dreadful to wait.  Your mind is good at convincing you that those racing thoughts ARE truly how you feel.  Don’t be fooled.  Past arguments are evidence that your mind keeps tricking you, so do everyone a favor and wait this one out.

~Lara

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When Someone Won’t Forgive You…

…what do you do?  Whether it was a friend from 2nd grade, a boyfriend, or family member, we can all remember of a time that we hurt someone.  If you were lucky, they forgave you.  If not, you may still be seeking forgiveness.

I’ve really struggled with this question over the years.  It is upsetting when you do everything you can to mAke iT riGhT—apologizes, phone calls, a kind demeanor, or even space away from you—to result in nothing more than a cold shoulder years later.  This is frustrating and can often tempt you to be angry at the person.  It’s this vicious cycle of you wanting forgiveness, them staying resentful, and then you being mad at them for still holding a grudge!

There comes a time when YOU just have to LeT Go.  Let Go of the fact that they may never forgive you.  If you have exhausted all options, you have done the best that you can.  You can’t live the rest of your life in misery because of something you’ve already tried to fix.  When you see them, continue to be friendly but don’t put your life on hold because you may never get the answer you are wanting.

And if you are the one that is still holding a grudge…re-read this post and put yourself in their shoes.  Realize how much you are missing out simply because you won’t give one of the biggest gifts you can give…FORGIVENESS.

~Lara

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Tough Issues–Cowards Vs. Heroes

Taken from Successful Farmer magazine: 

“The very human desire to run away from confrontation is so natural and common that we have to wonder how so many farm partnerships [or relationships in general] manage to survive and succeed in spite of it.

When trying to gather the courage to face a tough issue, it’s worth remembering that cowards die a thousand deaths, while heroes die but once. We know from experience that avoiding a battle doesn’t end a war – it just makes it that much tougher to fight, let alone win.

Fear can paralyze. It can keep a soldier from fighting for survival. It also can prevent people who love each other from coNfRoNting dangerous issues and solving them while that’s still possible. Armies learned centuries ago that even though fear can’t be eliminated, training and experience can instill habits that sidestep paralysis and enable action.

It can be the same in families. The straightforward commitment to face and rEsoLve day-to-day disagreements and misunderstanding, particularly the smaller, easier ones, develops the habit of reacting appropriately to issues as they arise.

It’s not so complicated. Sweat the small stuff first, day after day. It won’t make the big stuff any smaller, but it will make it that much easier to muster the courage for the scary face-to-face discussions that are so critical.”

I can relate to this article, can’t you? If I have a conflict with a friend, family member or coworker, it is much easier if I can work through the problem as soon as it comes up.  It is never easy, but it is worth it. Suppressing issues that arise only turn small problems into big ones. Do yourself a favor and Be a HeRo by resolving disagreements as they come.

~Lara

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This Isn’t Working

How many times have you thought up a wonderful idea in your head but, when it came down to execution, it was much more difficult than you planned?  Did you continue to force it to work or did you step back and realize ‘this isn’t working’?

SOURCE

I can think of nUmeRouS times I’ve tried to force a square peg into a round hole.   This past Christmas Robynn and I were trying to shoot a video for our blog.  The plan was to highlight all of our favorite Christmas crafts and cookies while we had a group of friends (and their kids) over.  Two minutes into the video we realized how crazy we were thinking we could record ourselves with a handful of toddlers in the room.  Come on, we are Mom’s!  Why didn’t we realize this earlier?!

There is a fine line between not giving up on a goal and reCogNiziNg when things need adjusted.  Many times we don’t realize this until we are in the moment but thankfully our gut does a pretty good job telling us when changes are needed!

What areas in your life are your forcing?  Are you planning a special event for your family and it is stressing everyone out?  Are you obsessing over perfection and it is upsetting everyone around you?

Many times there is a simple solution right there in front of you.  Perhaps it is something like..reschedulerethink…or… LET GO.

~Lara

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