Tag Archives: Mom

What’s Next?

 

It’s been ages since I posted and this year has been filled with twists, turns and unexpected trials and triumphs.  With my son moving up to 1st grade and my daughter going into her last year of nursery school, I found myself at a crossroad with no idea of the next direction I would go.  Being a stay at home mom for seven years was a gift that I am lucky to have had.  I started my role as “Mommy,” “Mama,” and “MOM” after teaching 1st grade for eight years and loved my new identity.  Time has flown by and I’ve come to the realization that I’ve been home almost as long as I was in the classroom and can’t imagine jumping back into a teaching career when I’ve been out of practice for so long.  So…where does that leave me?  I’m no longer a first grade teacher, an identity I cherished and was proud of, but I’m also not a mommy of babies and toddlers anymore which is what I came to love even more than my previous role.  I felt like I was slowly becoming NOBODY.

Bigger kids means bigger financial needs and the strain of a single income was becoming apparent.  The obvious solution would be going back to teaching.  However, there are no words to describe the anxiety I felt when even thinking about returning to teaching.  Being out of the classroom for so long makes it that much harder to imagine going back.  If I had taken a maternity leave and gone back right away my kids wouldn’t know any different and neither would I.  Problem is I know how much I love bringing them to school and picking them up.  I love “Mommy and Abby days” when she doesn’t have school.  I couldn’t imagine giving it up.

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Conflicted with finding an answer that would be best for our family I had one of those MEANT TO BE experiences that has changed the path from uncertainty to determination.  I have always believed that certain people come into our lives for a reason.  There is no doubt in my mind that Tracy was one of those people.  My husband went to high school with Tracy and we have been facebook friends for a while.  She lives in Georgia and was a marine biologist, but is now a division leader with lia sophia.  For those of you who are not familiar with lia sophia it is a direct sales company that offers gorgeous jewelry at affordable prices (Think Tupperware party, but with jewelry)!  One day Tracy sent me a message asking me if I would be willing to host a facebook virtual jewelry party so she could show her team that it is possible to connect with friends from out of state and build your business through technology.  I thought about it and mentioned it to my husband and he said to me, “Maybe you should talk to Tracy about selling lia sophia, she was a marine biologist and is now really successful doing this and is home with her kids.”  That was it…I talked to Tracy once and signed up!  That was two months ago and boy has my world CHANGED for the BETTER!  Through friends and family who volunteered to host parties I have been able to get my business started and already recruited a customer to join my “team”!  I am on my way to promoting to Unit Leader and am still in awe that this practically fell into my lap.  Tracy has guided me EVERY step of the way and has been my biggest cheerleader.  It is AMAZING to work for a company that encourages women to be their own boss, set goals and attain them, and live their dream.  My dream has always been to be home with my kids.  My fondest memories are of my mom being home with me and my sister.  I completely understand that this is not an option for many and that there are many women who even if staying home was an option would choose to continue with their career.  The choice we each make does not DEFINE the type of mother you are.  It does not make one of us better than the other.  It is simply the path that each mother takes on the road to raising their children to be the best they can be!

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In the past two months I have gained a new level of confidence and am proud of the work I have done to build my business.  Dressing up my “Mommy” clothes with all of my new jewelry has added an element of fun to my days.  I LOVE being my own boss, making my own hours, and helping our family out with finances.  People do come into our lives for a reason…Tracy came into mine to be the light on this exciting new journey that I am on.

Visit my business Website!

~Robyn (Jersey Girl)

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Filed under Dream Big, Finances, Good Life, Hard Reality, Inspire, Life, Marriage, New Jersey Robyn, Relationships, Self Image, SelfImprovement, You

The ReAL ME…

I recently read a facebook post from a college friend. Much like the writers of this blog, she is a “get real” kind of gal. This week she decided to go against the status quo and post the top ten “not so appealing” qualities about herself and her daily life. I know I share many HONEST moments with you, but thought this may be a different and fun way for you to learn more about the “not so appealing” parts of me! So here it goes…

1) I spend most days wearing the same outfit I wore to bed the night before (usually a t-shirt and sweats).

2) Many days I don’t look in the mirror or get around to brushing my teeth until after lunchtime.

3) Even though I was a major neat freak growing up, I go to bed with a messy house and dirty piles of laundry in my bedroom.

4) I have a major sweet tooth and often eat milk and cookies within an hour of going to bed!

5) I yell at my kids when I’m stressed.

6) I am not a very good gift giver. I’m lucky enough if I remember to buy a person a card for a special occasion.

7) I get cold sores when I am stressed and am extremely embarrassed to go out in public when I get them.

8) I eat when I am anxious, bored, upset, sad, happy….you name it!  I even eat after I am already stuffed.

9) I rarely mop the floor, even when I know guests are coming! I find it pointless since the kids will spill something on it within minutes anyway.

10) I don’t wear sunscreen every time I step out the door, even though I already had 4 pre-cancerous moles surgically removed.

11) I let my kids eat leftover homemade cookies for breakfast when I’m too lazy to make them oatmeal.

12) When I am on the phone I allow my kids get into all sorts of things they aren’t supposed to–whatever I can do to keep them distracted.

13) I make mistakes in my business (www.letterblockshop.com).  When I mess up an order I obsess about it for hours and feel like a failure.  No business is perfect.

14) Even as a grown woman, I use to be scared to stay home alone (at night) when Doug was away on business trips.

15) I always feel like I have weight to lose and areas on my body that need toned…yet…I rarely do anything about it (I hate to exercise!)

16) I don’t have a very good memory when it comes to historical facts and things I should remember from all my years of school. The game trivial pursuit terrifies me!

17) I spent 4 1/2 years to be a music teacher.  I only taught one year, haven’t played the piano in over 4 years, I rarely sing, and I am not renewing my teaching certificate.

18) Since I limit my kids to 1 hour of  TV during the day, it is very rare that I watch the news.  I usually never know what is going on!

19) I feel guilty that I don’t spend enough time with my kids, even though I am home all day.

20) I procrastinate when I write these posts. I usually get them done the night before or the morning of!

Despite all of the above, I know that I am NORMAL and that in the grand scheme of things, none of this is a big deal. Hope this list helps reassure you of the same! No one is perfect. No one has their life together as well as it appears.  Take a sigh of relief!

~Lara

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I Love You Anyway

This past week the phrase “I Love You Anyway” became a popular saying in our house.  I did something that I knew disappointed my husband.  Feeling terrible after I saw the let down on his face I asked, “But you love me anyway, right?”  He replied, “Of CouRse.”

Then a few days later, my daughter broke one of my favorite Christmas ornaments.  Initially I gasped, but after seeing how terrible she felt I said, “Leanne…it is oKaY.  Accidents happen.  I LoVe you anyway.”

I am so gRateFul for the people in my life that will love me anyway…no matter if I ruin their favorite shirt…cancel on a play-date because I’m feeling overwhelmed as a Mom…or call them to vent and never ask them how their day is going.

Everyone needs someone in their life that will show unconditional loVe whether it be a friend, family member, spouse or pet (and of course Jesus!  Can I get an “Amen?!”).  Maybe it is time to return the favor and show someone you love them back, even though they hurt you recently or did something that bothered you.  Remember how great it feels to be loved “anyway”, and give it to another in return.

P.S. These roses were a “surprise” from Doug and Leanne after church on Sunday.  Just another reminder that I am LoVed AnYwAy!  Now it’s time for me to pass it on….

~Lara

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I AM…a Nursing Instructor

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Can Anyone Hear Me?

I’m writing this post today with a scratch in my throat.  No, not a scratch due to a cold, but a scratch due to raising my voice to get my kid’s AttEnTion or tell them they need to stop doing something for the 20th time!  Can you relate?

I remember my teaching days and how I learned in college that no good teacher will YELL at their students to get them to listen.  I just had to LaUgh when I thought of that today.  It is amazing what situations can make you ScReAm, regardless if you are a “good” parent or not.

When I reach the point of YELLING it is an instant reminder that I need a B R E A K.  I need to ask for help, get a babysitter, or take a night off and distance myself from the kiddos so I can sort out my thoughts and relax.  When I do, I am much more patient with the kids and it makes me feel like a better Mom because I can handle frustrating situations with more ease.

No one wants to be the yelling Mom…so the best thing to is find a SoLuTion to the problem…see you after my nap ;)

~Lara

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I AM…A Triathlete

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Guilt Trip

We’ve been on a few trips in our life and we would have to say, this is the one we enjoy the least.  In fact, we don’t think we could use the word “enjoy” at all, because quite frankly guilt trips are down right TorMenTiNg.

In the last week we have been talking about this IsSuE not just with each other, but with other moms.

The discussion goes something like this, we feel GuiLtY because it seems that we are “riding” our kids non-stop, constantly having to correct them, instruct them, discipline them, etc.  When we look at our husbands who seem to just get to enjoy the kids, then comes the guilt.  “My husband gets to have all the fun.  I do all the correcting.  I’m not a good mom because I should be playing with my kids.  I feel like I am always nagging my kids.”

The truth is, as mom’s we all have DiFfeReNt GiFtS.  For some moms, playing with their kids may be what naturally flows out of them, for others, maybe it’s nurtuing.  Maybe you love cooking with your kids or reading to them.  Both of us are very loving with our kids.  We love to cuddle with them.  It’s what comes natural to us and as a result, it’s what we do the best at.  When they are sad, its mom they come running to.  However, instead of FoCuSinG on our strength as mother’s we focus on the area where we are lacking.  The result:  Guilt.  We know better, but we do it anyway.   Ugh!!

When we think back to our childhood neither of us remember our mom’s playing with us.  Ever.  However, we both have very FoNd MeMoRiEs of our moms.  They were a very safe place to land – LoViNg and wArm, SeCuRe and sAfE.

So if you’re feeling guilt, ask yourself if it is self-imposed.  Sure, there are times we know we should do better, but guilt goes so beyond this.

If you’re struggling with guilt, take a good look at why.  Is there a change you need to make?  If so, make the change, but then give yourself a break and enjoy your kids by focusing on the things that come NaTuRaL to you.

:)

~Robynn and Lara~

Check out a similar post by Lara called “Mommy Guilt” by clicking here.

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