What advice would you leave for your loved ones if you knew you may not live the life you envisioned? This past month I was faced with one of the scariest unknowns of my life and by the GrAcE of GoD everything turned out fine and I am here to write about it and inspire. It started out like any other Sunday in our house with the usual noise and chaos followed by dinner at my parents house, but throughout the day I kept noticing an annoying pain in my right breast. I am a worrier so I called my gynecologist the next morning which was Monday and made an appointment for Tuesday morning to get it checked out. I was hoping the Dr. would say that he didn’t feel anything and that there was nothing to worry about, but there it was, “Well, I feel a few lumps that we need to have checked out.” I tried to remain calm and hold it together until I could get in my car and call to make an appointment for a mammogram and ultrasound. Luckily there was a cancellation for the following day so I knew I would just have to make it through the next 24 hours of not knowing. I knew that being 35 didn’t mean anything as far as breast cancer was concerned because I have friends who were diagnosed before they were 40. I kept praying that the lumps would turn out to be cysts or something curable, but my mind couldn’t stop from drifting to the “What if?”
The next day I went for my mammogram and ultrasound and waited in the ultrasound room for the results as the radiologists read the tests. It felt like an eternity as I lay on the table waiting to find out if there was any trace of cancer. I started to think, “Am I going to get to see my son go to his prom in a tuxedo with his spiky hair?” and “I better start writing advice down for Abby like, If you are ever shopping and have to make a decision between two colors and pink is one of the options…always pick PINK!” I felt numb, as my eyes filled with tears thinking about all I had to lose. Turns out there was no sign of cancer or cysts or anything of the sort. Apparently it is normal to have dense breast tissue at this age with lumps that come and go within your cycle. HoWeVeR…do not take this as any sort of medical advice and follow-up on anything you may feel in the future!
So it has been about three weeks since my scare and it got me thinking about my advice for Abby. Why should I wait for a tragedy to start writing down things that I think are important for my kids to know? Whether it be silly shopping advice or a story about how my husband and I met, I think now is as good a time as any to get writing and start a memento that both of my children will have for years down the road.
~Robyn (Jersey Girl)